The Quest for balance.

Posted byMoushmi RadhanparaPosted inJust when I don't know anything.Tags:, , ,

“Keep your eyes on the stars, and your feet on the ground.”

-Theodore Roosevelt once said.

Who wouldn’t agree to that? Who wouldn’t want that balance? I for one could kill for that equilibrium and poise in my life. And yet I do not know how to attain such beautiful stability. If only I could get that my life would be suave and perfectly even. But then whose life is?

Every time I get a promotion at my job I celebrate as if suddenly I was the CEO of the company.

Every time something would be all on the upper scale in my life I would be carried away.

Any man that I date and seem to be perfect I tell myself “He is the one.” But then he is not.

Every time life seems to be going smooth, once for a change, I would think to myself, “It seems finally I am being rewarded and I can stop looking back to those times and move on without being scared.” But then boom how can that be? It is me, how can things be smooth?

I celebrate success as if there would never be another victory. I repent something as if there could be nothing more warped than my situation. And I have got only one lesson through all of this. I can be as happy as I want but a certain part of frightfulness has to be present in my heart, deep down it has to be there. I can be as atrocious and dreadful as I could be but then deep down my heart must know, “Even this will pass.” A tiny star should be blinking there all throughout even in the moments of utter darkness.

I am yet struggling with this. I know that it is not as easy for everyone to be so balanced, but now that I am trying to be it feels good. I have not reached there and I know I might never will but then trying seems to be doing it for me now.

It is difficult to be ‘there’ and ‘here’ together, but it is different, stunningly apart.

The trick to me is, “How can I reach somewhere so high a place and yet try being here? Well, I am here, but trying to reach there too.

*

PS: I do not know if any of this makes any sense to you. Sometimes it doesn’t even make justification to me.

picture: Google

Published by Moushmi Radhanpara

A bilingual writer, Moushmi Radhanpara has authored three poetry collections so far, namely POSIES and 03:21 AM –An Ode to Rust & Restlessness, and Resignation of an Angel. She is also scribbling an unplanned rough draft of a story as a part of NANOWRIMO 2020 and hopes that something might come out of it. She has also co-authored two books, The Lockdown Stories and Mirage so far. Her poetries can be found on her blog https://aestheticmiradh.com/ and a few other online portals. She believes in the fact that a better reader makes a better writer. Reading a 100 books a year is her latest obsession. She can be found either drunk on coffee or hiding away from everything and admiring the gorgeous sun.

9 thoughts on “The Quest for balance.”

  1. Why not celebrating the achievements? I think the trick is to be aware that there will be ups and downs along the way. Always. If you are on a high you will eventually get grounded again. So why not enjoying it (and celebrating) while it lasts 🙂

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  5. I liked this post. My thoughts on it comes from the Bhagavad Gita :” To try and treat all situations equally ” , not being too happy on anything and not feeling low for anything. Life is a chemical equation , even in equilibrium , technically it is dyanamic

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