It breaks my heart every time I see him and I still have no idea what to do about it. I thought he completely forgot me, I did not even existed for him but then he just comes in front of me and is gushing all his charm on me and I the instant fool, am all over his flaws.
‘Oh I am all good’ I say, but inside, my heart is piercing, shattering into pieces.
What do I do?
But my heart never wants to.
So I stay and talk despite all the impossibilities.
“I am all good, how are you?” I really want to know. I want to know how has he been? How has life treated him? How is his work? Is everything okay at home? Above all, I want to know why, just why it took him so long to acknowledge my presence? I had been around for quite a time now but it didn’t seem to matter to him. I had a lot many questions but I kept shut, we smiled and talked about general stuff and after a while I say good bye. I knew, this time I had to say it first, I didn’t want to be left back again. I can tell from his ways that he has to go now, and I have to accept it.
“Good bye.” His smile went deeper into my heart.
It was easy for him to come and go and return after even declining my existence for so long.
But it wasn’t for me, just wasn’t for me.