Whispered mocking

She stood there, staring blindly at the silvery wall, with no engravings on it. She hoped she would change them one day to a brighter colour, never liking the dull, un-happening colour. After all it was her personal space, where no one had the right to bother her, except of course a knock every now and then, but otherwise it was her place, her space. And no one would burst in here without her accent.

Leisurely she turned the knob on to let the water cascade from all sides. She stood there calm, a battle raging within. And yet she smiled. Did the water cool her?

She shut her eyes, and sat down on the floor, letting the water reach her from all sides, leaving no escape from it. She seemed to enjoy it. The water was cold, but so was the temperature outside and so were the people that she just left in the middle of a movie.

Her face was wet, but she knew not, if it was the shower or were there some tears involved? It had been usual for her to be mocked at, and she had long lost the hope to make people understand that it wasn’t her fault after all, she needn’t be laughed at.

And now, just after a long shower, she was past it, she was the strong adamant girl again who would fight any one off, who would knock your nose if you misbehave, who would punch you in the stomach if you say something disgraceful.

Sluggishly, she got up holding onto the curtain. She did not mind her nude body, not her bulky stomach, not her flappy arms, least of all not even her friend’s mockings. Giving a bright smile looking at her reflection in the mirror she voiced herself, “I am a beautiful woman. I am strong and I am invincible.” Almost priding on humming to the song “I am strong, I am invincible, I am woman.” And suddenly the scoffing’s and scornful comments on her bulky body by her friends, or by anyone else did not matter.

She was well past that.

Turning the shower off, she came out of the room wrapped in a towel. Her mother asking her to wear a robe instead was waiting with some weight loss drink and a reminder of her workout session.

Silently, smiling at her mom, thanking her, she drank from the tall glass, and took out the tracks from the cupboard.

Just when her mother left, she whispered to herself, “Who cares if I lose weight or not, I don’t. I am not a fan of size 0.”

Published by Moushmi Radhanpara

A bilingual writer, Moushmi Radhanpara has authored three poetry collections so far, namely POSIES and 03:21 AM –An Ode to Rust & Restlessness, and Resignation of an Angel. She is also scribbling an unplanned rough draft of a story as a part of NANOWRIMO 2020 and hopes that something might come out of it. She has also co-authored two books, The Lockdown Stories and Mirage so far. Her poetries can be found on her blog https://aestheticmiradh.com/ and a few other online portals. She believes in the fact that a better reader makes a better writer. Reading a 100 books a year is her latest obsession. She can be found either drunk on coffee or hiding away from everything and admiring the gorgeous sun.

55 thoughts on “Whispered mocking

    1. Thank you so much. I totally agree that if one wants to be happy then one must lobe him/her self as and how they are.
      And these norms really do not matter to me, what is important is one’s heart and soul, being true to yourself.. So I guess I had to make my protagonist stand up 🙂

      Like

  1. Respecting one’s own self, (body, mind and soul) is the first step to a rewarding existence in this world. Everything else will either follow or will fall out accordingly. Well-written piece Moushmi!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. In everything, from body size to skin color, to shape, etc…people will say something and we decide whether to let it get to us, or let it go. The choice is always up to us.
    Great post, Moushmi. It is a captivating piece.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Somewhere we need to begin and quit worrying about what the world will think… we need to Accept the beauty of the soul who resides in our body!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. wow…just wow….i loved it….people judge us by our looks way too much…emotions get played with and faces get lost…there is no shame in this…people should not make fun like this..be it friends….great post…keep up the good work.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Sure…well that is human nature…we judge others too much…we ourself are also to blame…on the first look everyone wants a babe…slim, beautiful and kind….and no i am not talking about 3 different girls…but what we really need is someone who can adjust with you all the way.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Yeah…we can say these things but we ourself wont apply these to our lives…that is what is really sad….what to do??

        Haha…going to upload tonight…just going home now!!

        Liked by 1 person

  5. If man is to change, then mind set must be obviously tuned in to the music of change. We either move in melody with societal misperceptions or dance to nature’s due. Or probably to ourselves and our instincts. These, simultaneous or coincidental happening or whatever happens cave man and then engrave his abilities. Thanks goodness she didn’t downtrodden self for societal perceptions about her self. She is who is she is and not what others see her to be.
    Can we say, it must be of nature and chance that she is born over fat and that it could have happened to any of them who mock her? I wonder how they would have taken it if she was the one mocking them….
    Nice work it has got me thinking about societal misjudges and due of nature.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for your thoughtful comment.
      I am glad that you gave it a thought.
      I’d like to know too how would ‘they’ react if they were in place of her.
      People need to be more sensitive than just simply mocking others.

      Like

  6. There luxury of making decisions for self must not be betrayed. After all, human instincts and differences are chance of nature happenings and shouldn’t be a plight misjudgement from society.
    We are different in different ways and from different angles of perceptions….but all, the mind and how we read the messages from the environment and how we understand and how the mind interpret such understanding is subjected to influence. So I don’t get people making mockery of others without bothering about theirs without knowing that we are created by God differently but same. Or that’s how nature willed on man through creation?
    Well written Dear…..

    Liked by 1 person

Your perception holds importance for me.

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