The Two Ends Of My Life!

Drinking that warm cup of coffee opening your morning newspaper, and reading the exact situation of your life in the paper. Yes, this was all my day was about today.

A very interesting column by Bikram Vohra titled “To sum up life” caught my eye and it was aptly hilarious for me. Not that the situation is. But the fact that my life is in such tatters and that this writer has accurately put pen to paper, was a little it amusing to me.

He pleads his left end of the life to meet the right end. He wonders, despite all the problems in the current scenario, why is everybody else doing so good in life, while his own life is only laughable. By the end he almost concludes saying that these two ends needn’t even meet. He’d be happy if only, the two separate ends would oblige him by accepting to be on the same book, by simply accepting that they live in the same planet.

The situation may not be true for him, but it sure is for me. For him, it might just be a column, but I’d safely say that it is my truth for now. While everyone else is doing good, or at least doing something, I feel I am stationed at a harbor for eternity, without a boat, without knowing how to swim, without a destination if I’d want to walk somewhere to. The only possibility is I keep walking without a feeling of satisfaction of having done something.

Yeah, yeah, you will say I will reach somewhere, have patience. Everyone reaches someplace sooner or later. Everyone takes their own time. I will reach someplace too. Yeah yeah yeah… but till then I can’t help feel this way. People rubbing their noses on me, making me realize how insignificant I am, how much good they are up to.

I am not comparing myself to others. All I ever want to is to be a better version of myself with every passing day, but sometimes I just lose it all and then feel like both ends of my life have kept me somewhere and have forgotten that they belong to me. These forgetful ends seem to have disowned me and have decided to never be in accord with me.

So, the two ends, please, will you please try and remember where I am, because I have tired myself searching for you, and you in return seem to enjoy this game of hide and seek. Please, will you please, if not meet each other or me, at the least agree to be in the same book, accept that we all live in the same planet?



Published by Moushmi Radhanpara

A bilingual writer, Moushmi Radhanpara has authored three poetry collections so far, namely POSIES and 03:21 AM –An Ode to Rust & Restlessness, and Resignation of an Angel. She is also scribbling an unplanned rough draft of a story as a part of NANOWRIMO 2020 and hopes that something might come out of it. She has also co-authored two books, The Lockdown Stories and Mirage so far. Her poetries can be found on her blog and a few other online portals. She believes in the fact that a better reader makes a better writer. Reading a 100 books a year is her latest obsession. She can be found either drunk on coffee or hiding away from everything and admiring the gorgeous sun.

28 thoughts on “The Two Ends Of My Life!

  1. Oh Moushmi, did I tell you that we are long lost sisters. I relate to almost everything you write and like you I’ve been waiting for my two ends to meet for more than a decade to say the least!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. In your DP you hold a mirror, try seeing the reflection of yours from the twinkling eyes of your reader. Your posts are deep, thought provoking and your comments witty and charming. For us you are already someone whom we want to hear from, who we want to connect to. Love

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Your post itself shows that you are a seeker of higher versions and truths. It takes time to get comfortable in that journey itself. Patience was never my virtue too but I did have to learn to appreciate the time and space it takes just to know that I am headed somewhere and I am certainly not where I was yesterday. It is a very rich journey and those around that seem comfortable are not looking for what you are. Wish you the best of ease & joy!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Well written and so relatable!

    Reminded me of a quote I’d once read –

    “Even when in the midst of disturbance, the stillness of the mind can offer sanctuary.”
    ― Stephen Richards, The Ultimate Cosmic Ordering Meditation

    Liked by 1 person

  5. My first feeling is to say something existential, but why so? This moment of self-reflection is so poignant and full of feeling. Your words push me to consider my own life, my own world. And that’s a good thing. 🙂

    Thank you for sharing, Moushmi.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. yet another thoughtful and thought provoking post.
    But I must say you guys are lucky to have only two ends, what about the ones with many, especially when none of these ends justifies the means.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Seeing others do good and feeling miserable for ourselves….sounds familiar 😊…one of the ways i tried to get over it is by ‘not seeing’ others…isolating myself socially and only thinking about where i am going…kind of helpful but then depressing too…

    Liked by 1 person

Your perception holds importance for me.

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