Category Archives: Keep Smiling :-)

Self Obsession!

I love myself. Hell yeah, I do! I mean come on, I am awesome 😀

Okay, enough with the self obsession.

I say this today because I love one thing about me. Whenever I read something good, a word, a sentence, a quote, a paragraph, I write it down and keep it with myself. At first, I used to keep a small memo pad or a pocket diary full of such amazing, jaw dropping quotes. (It doesn’t mean you like these quotes too. It is only, my taste that we are talking about here) But over the time I have stopped keeping that diary and instead I just write it down. So by now I have such wonderful lines written everywhere, on post it’s, on the back of a journal, on a single torn paper, on my phone, as a memo, as a draft message, and pretty much everywhere. What is wrong with this method is the fact that I cannot ever compile them at a single place now. But on the other hand, I get these as a surprise sometimes when I am least expecting them. For instance, today, I was rummaging through an old book, where I found a folded sheet of paper on which there was a very beautiful line. I am not even going to try translating it from Hindi, for the effort is going to be extremely hilarious. But I attach the sheet below, if by chance you like it.

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I am pretty sure, this was not from a book, but may be a historical TV series, I just cannot place it. But isn’t it pretty? And ever since I have found this, I am simply smiling, smiling like an ignorant fool.

And even if it is not, I like it all the same. I love it, in fact. Remember, it’s all about self love now? So I love this, I love the way I keep writing these beautiful lines everywhere. and yes, I love myself!! Kyuki mai apni favourite hoon!! 😀

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Half Moon!

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न जाने क्यों,

मुझे उस ढलती शाम के

अधूरे चाँद से अलग ही प्यार है.

*

Somehow,

I brace a different kind of love for that half moon,

advancing the evening.

 

PS:I know I could have never come up with an English translation, sounding almost the same as the Hindi version; still worth a try may be?

 

Mr. Coffee Hater #2

Aaj jane ki zid na karo.. yu hi pehlu me baithe raho…..

 

I hum along the very old lyrics, sitting in my balcony, sipping that hot cup of coffee, drenching in that cool, chilly after-rain air, that unseasonal rain which leaves everything all the more beautiful. I am lost; lost in that very strong cup of coffee, lost among those very soothing winds; lost in a different era of love.

 

I am lost when suddenly, out of nowhere, disconcerting my train of thoughts, This stupid Mr. Coffee Hater barges in rushing, fluttering, clapping, smiling, “Pehle muje ane to do, uske baad me jane ki zid karunga na.” I have to literally battle with my calm, with my soothing mind to come back and realize what exactly happened.

 

“You frightened me.” I scream.

“Someone’s in a mood!!” comes back the taunting respond.

“Don’t even let me begin on mood.”

“Oh ever the dramatic Moushmi.”

“Yeah? You think I do drama all the time?”

“Well, not all the time. At least not when you sing such wonderful, soulful songs for me.”

He thinks the song is for him!! Oh God!! Can he really be any more self-obsessive?

“The song wasn’t for you.” I retort.

“Of course it wasn’t.” And he tries patting my hand.

“Oh, just get lost.”

“But I just came in.” He tries with all his roughish charms.

“Yeah, but you didn’t come in when I needed you. Oh, you are just the same. It will probably do you more good if you just left!”

“I was busy.” He tries puppy faces.

“Yeah, and so I am, now!! Any plans on leaving, then?”

“Well, I am not disturbing you, am I?”

“Yes, you are.”

“No, I am not. All I can remember is you were singing or should I say trying to sing a song, whereby you were pleading with me to not go.” He smirks.

“For the 100thtime, the song wasn’t for you.”

“Let’s say, I agree that it wasn’t for me. Then may I ask, whom were you dedicating it to?” He really tries.

“No, you may not know.”

“Oh, come on! I go away for a little while and you throw all your tantrums on me. I said I am sorry.”

“No, you never said sorry!”

“I did.”

“In your head, you did!!”

“Someone’s really angry this time!.” He mumbles.

“I heard that!!

“Yeah, well if you heard that, do you hear me asking for that damned coffee?”

“Since when have you started liking coffee?”

“Oh, I still hate it. But if that is what it takes for you to calm down, lady? Then coffee it is!”

“Oh come on. I don’t want your upkaar.” I snap.

“It is not upkaar. I mean it.” He smiles that foolish smile.

I wonder. Is he right? Is he fooling me? I try to read his face, but before I can he changes the topic. “So, I hear you were really missing me?”

“I have better things to do, than miss someone who hates coffee!”

“Are we still on that?”

“Well, we will be on that until you start drinking coffee!!”

“So, is there anything new except of your coffee?” he changes the topic again.

“No.” I am still very adamant.

“How’s work?

“Good.”…………. “But come to think of it….”

“There it is. I was just wondering how have you not ‘thought’ of anything so far. HAHAHA you and your thinking.”

“If my thinking bothers you so much, then why did you come here again?”

“I heard you were missing me.” He flatters himself.

“Well, you had fake news. Be assured of that!”

“Seriously?” He rolls his eyes at me.

“Yes!!”

“Oh, in that case I must go. I just thought……”

“Ha ha! Caught you. I have told you. Thinking isn’t your responsibility. You fail miserably at it.”

“Yeah, I know. I just thought I was better at it by now.”

“There, you are doing it again. My dear, you just are pathetic at it.” I rejoice in his failure.

“Yeah? So are you.”

“In what, may I ask?”

No, you may not!!”

Uuuuuuuurrrgggggghhhhhhhhhh

“Why not?”

“Just….”

“Okay, don’t say. But are you going to ever tell me where exactly have you been for so many days?”

“No!” Comes the blatant reply.

“Really?” I stare dumbfounded.

What is wrong with you? I want to scream. But I sip my coffee instead.

“So, what brings you here, today, after so many days? I thought you just forgot me?”

“You!!”

“Oh, please don’t start that again!! Stop being cheesy!!”

“It’s not cheesy.”

“It is.”

“It’s not. And even if it is, at least it’s better than your coffee!!”

I remain silent.

“Are you going to say anything?” He chirps.

I am still silent.

“Okay, then I am leaving.” He is losing patience now.

“WAIT! You can’t go….”

“I know. I know. The coffee isn’t over yet.” He finishes for me.

“So do I get the pleasure to know your name, now?” I am all too politeness for him.

He rolls his eyes and smirks. He just knows its fake.

“You could you if you wanted to.”

“But you won’t say your name.” I almost spill my cup in screaming at him.

“You won’t ask.” He bats his wings angrily.

“I just did.”

“Okay, I will tell you today, just as soon as you finish your idiotic, extremely hot, stupid, excessively strong, unwanted and sour coffee!!!!!”

He has crossed his limits.

I fume.

He winks.

I gulp down the coffee. Enough is enough. I will know his name, today.

He winks again. He smiles mischievously. Bats his wings.

“Aisi baate kiya na karo..” And just as swiftly he flies away, above and beyond. And in another second he is too far away from me.

He is gone. The coffee cup is empty. The wind is whistling into my ears. In the background the wonderful lady, that gorgeous Farida Khannumsmiles vainly into nothingness, “Jaan jati hai jab uth k jate ho tum……..

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Until we meet again.

 

Take care!

More about this stupid, nerving, extremely irritating Coffee Hater: Mr. Coffee Hater- My New Friend!

Hopes And Expectations!

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Just wondering..

While on the one hand you are striving towards it, and on the other there is only faith and a vain belief.

What exactly happens?

Does that belief turn into the expectations that we are taught not to have?

Or the hope itself is a reflection on the said expectations which we are not suppose to have?

Or, is there a fine line between hope and expectations which I am blinded not to see?

Or they are just two words trying to play with my mind?

Any thoughts?

 

Calm!!

This is what I came upon social media today. Guess, being socially active is not after all, all bad?

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A much needed respite from daily humdrum, from routine monotony, from everyday expectations.

Try it, it does look, sound and feel peaceful!

 

Grumpiness And Twittering!

I had a rough day. Well, honestly I am having a rough year since last year and so I have started taking and considering things by days and hours. So now I don’t ask someone on a Saturday, “how was your week?” I simply ask, “Ho was your day?” when someone asks me for a plan on a Friday, when today is still Wednesday, I reply “I’ll tell you a day prior to it.” Things have been so surprising (in a really wrong and unhappy way) that I have started dealing things one at a time, because really? Future? More unacceptable and uncertain than I thought!

 

So yeah, a rough day again!! Pretty mundane for me now. And returning from that rough day all I want to do is sit at home, watch that stupid TV where nothing is good on telecast, eat and go to sleep. Yeah, even if it is too early!! I am just tired.

 

So there I was succumbing to my mundane plan, getting into my sulky pajamas, when I heard a perky chirping somewhere around. Didn’t realize where? Didn’t give it a second thought. Ran about my chores.

 

I heard it again.

 

“What the hell? What is this noise? Can I not even sulk, in peace?” grumbled my grumpy self.

 

The noise stopped instantly!

 

I open the sandwich that I have brought myself and make some coffee.

 

The chirping continues.

 

On second thought it seemed like a wind chime. And the grouchy me hated that happy sound. What was the reason for being happy anyways?

 

I rush to my balcony to see if someone has put that stupid thing on again?

 

No sign!

 

The chirping persists.

 

I try to ignore. Go back to my sandwich.

 

Coffee seems the only thing to stay with me.

 

Chirping..

More chirping..

And then even more chirping. Like a bundle of noise thrown at me. It grows louder, and even louder, so louder that I feel that it is coming from inside my house. But where from exactly? And who, let me see, has the nerve to irritate me further?

 

I rush to the living room, ignoring my food in the kitchen table.

 

Holy mother of God!!

 

There is a gang of birds inside my house, giving me a live performance of that twittering. I am taken by surprise. Shocked! How the hell did they come in? I mean the window is open, but they never come in. Why? How? And why today, then? And look at the audacity. The birds are not just simply sitting and flying away. Not a place for temporary rest! They are most comfortably seated, around 20 of them and are singing happy tunes at their pitch of their voices!! I am alarmed and happy at the same time. Yes, happy! Yeah, the grumpy me swiftly changes my mood from being that grumpy Ove to that smiling bird. And what voices they have, what tunes they deliver. Oh my, oh my!! And they stay.

 

I go closer, not fearing that they will fly away. Something tells me that they will stay. And stay they did.

 

I am sitting just inches away, listening to them, lost somewhere.

 

When I open my eyes, I feel so relieved, so much so that I haven’t felt in pretty long time. I take their presence for granted; leave to get my food and the coffee, which is turning cold. I come back to find them just as I had left them. Really?

 

I eat with the presence of a live band singing melodies into my ears.

 

After I have satisfied my hunger, I clear the plate and the cup, drop them in the sink, only to find that their voices are lowering, and they are leaving one by one. I rush back to the window.

 

I don’t know what tells me to do so, but in that instant I grab my phone, and click a picture. By the time I have done so, all I am left with a different click of perhaps, Mr. Coffee Hater?

 

Why did they leave? (Greedy much?)

 

Oh the melody! (Hypocrite much?)

 

Who needs them anyway? (Yeah, right!)

 

“I don’t even like wind chimes and the birds were pretty much just the same.” And with this thought I rush back to my room.

 

PS: If you zoom into the picture you’ll get to see the grumpy coffee hater! 😀