Category Archives: Ramblings of my mind.

A Raving Reminiscence.

The lane is empty

Except for the kacchi kairi

Kacchi kairi strewn across on both sides.

“What is kacchi kairi?” he asks.

I turn to him, and give him an imploring look-

See for yourself.

“All I see is beaten, tattered, useless raw mangoes.”

I give him that look again.

I smile.

I keep walking, walking

On that lane which is delusory,

Empty, except for kacchi kairi.

The trees tower over us

The greenery overpowering us, shadowing us

From the clouds.

The faint drizzle seething into our veins

The pungent raw smell

Overwhelming my memories from which I have abstained.

The lane desolate, leaves scattered about,

Kacchi kairi’s standing orthodoxly, waiting

For my retrieval into the fond memories

Buried deep, somewhere inside.

And in a trance I was transported eons back

Playing- carefree-

Callous- teasing-

Happy!

The sweet sour memory of eating that kacchi kairi,

The soft tiniest bite

Sour juices flowing

Eyes barely opening

And yet I would take bite after

Bite.

That sweet-sour memory of kacchi kairi.

“So what’s new in that? You still eat kacchi kairi.”

“I know”, I sigh!

Its different I want to cry.

But I give him that smile.

It’s just not the same kacchi kairi!

“So what, now you want that same raw mangoes that you ate

As a child? Don’t you think that’s rather impractical?”

The rage that gnaws at me is minutely conquered

By the insanity that he thinks I live in.

I don’t answer.

I just give him that look,

And he gives me that look

When he thinks that I want to make him understand

Without the words,

And he thinks I don’t know that he does understand,

He just enjoys his taunts more

But I know

And he knows.

And we draw each other together,

Closer.

And we walk that deserted lane,

Where there is nothing

The lane is empty,

Except for the kacchi kairi.

Kacchi kairi strewn across on both sides.

 

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Superhuman.

I wonder how people exactly multi task so much. Oh, don’t get me wrong; I am not talking about simple things like walking and texting, or eating and watching TV. I have bigger issues today. There are people who do millions of things together and yet seem never to get tired.

 

I know some people who do this! I am not kidding!!

 

Their chores start the moment the wake up, and seem never ending. It all begins with a morning work out/ exercise/ walk, and goes on to their respective jobs. Well of course a single job doesn’t suffice and so there is another part time work from home thing. And they seem to have time for that too. Their lunches are always never alone, considering how many people they have to keep up with. The evening brings back the writing ant inside of them and hence starts the blogging world, which of course requires an exceptional amount of time. Blogging is of course never a one-hand thing, leading to various social media for recognition, where of course they are extraordinarily rewarded. They have a social presence in a virtual world too. Their friends know their whereabouts constantly, from what they are doing, where they are doing, to why and with whom they are. Hence their social life is hype. Well, as dusk falls, dinner reservations are made for social life is not for only social media, made. So, when the person comes back home, with a stomach full, and a little weekday booze, a coffee is needed so that the person does not snooze. As the exams are approaching the person needs to prepare too. And hence a couple of hours are spent, wracking the brains and selecting the mains, whereby sleep befalls, and peace prevails.

 

Please tell me how do these people do this! Are they even human or some super power do they attain? Do I lack that kind of brain? Or am I just too lazy and of course a little crazy to even follow that kind of train?

 

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PS: This is me, pretty much after doing every single thing!

Mr. Coffee Hater #2

Aaj jane ki zid na karo.. yu hi pehlu me baithe raho…..

 

I hum along the very old lyrics, sitting in my balcony, sipping that hot cup of coffee, drenching in that cool, chilly after-rain air, that unseasonal rain which leaves everything all the more beautiful. I am lost; lost in that very strong cup of coffee, lost among those very soothing winds; lost in a different era of love.

 

I am lost when suddenly, out of nowhere, disconcerting my train of thoughts, This stupid Mr. Coffee Hater barges in rushing, fluttering, clapping, smiling, “Pehle muje ane to do, uske baad me jane ki zid karunga na.” I have to literally battle with my calm, with my soothing mind to come back and realize what exactly happened.

 

“You frightened me.” I scream.

“Someone’s in a mood!!” comes back the taunting respond.

“Don’t even let me begin on mood.”

“Oh ever the dramatic Moushmi.”

“Yeah? You think I do drama all the time?”

“Well, not all the time. At least not when you sing such wonderful, soulful songs for me.”

He thinks the song is for him!! Oh God!! Can he really be any more self-obsessive?

“The song wasn’t for you.” I retort.

“Of course it wasn’t.” And he tries patting my hand.

“Oh, just get lost.”

“But I just came in.” He tries with all his roughish charms.

“Yeah, but you didn’t come in when I needed you. Oh, you are just the same. It will probably do you more good if you just left!”

“I was busy.” He tries puppy faces.

“Yeah, and so I am, now!! Any plans on leaving, then?”

“Well, I am not disturbing you, am I?”

“Yes, you are.”

“No, I am not. All I can remember is you were singing or should I say trying to sing a song, whereby you were pleading with me to not go.” He smirks.

“For the 100thtime, the song wasn’t for you.”

“Let’s say, I agree that it wasn’t for me. Then may I ask, whom were you dedicating it to?” He really tries.

“No, you may not know.”

“Oh, come on! I go away for a little while and you throw all your tantrums on me. I said I am sorry.”

“No, you never said sorry!”

“I did.”

“In your head, you did!!”

“Someone’s really angry this time!.” He mumbles.

“I heard that!!

“Yeah, well if you heard that, do you hear me asking for that damned coffee?”

“Since when have you started liking coffee?”

“Oh, I still hate it. But if that is what it takes for you to calm down, lady? Then coffee it is!”

“Oh come on. I don’t want your upkaar.” I snap.

“It is not upkaar. I mean it.” He smiles that foolish smile.

I wonder. Is he right? Is he fooling me? I try to read his face, but before I can he changes the topic. “So, I hear you were really missing me?”

“I have better things to do, than miss someone who hates coffee!”

“Are we still on that?”

“Well, we will be on that until you start drinking coffee!!”

“So, is there anything new except of your coffee?” he changes the topic again.

“No.” I am still very adamant.

“How’s work?

“Good.”…………. “But come to think of it….”

“There it is. I was just wondering how have you not ‘thought’ of anything so far. HAHAHA you and your thinking.”

“If my thinking bothers you so much, then why did you come here again?”

“I heard you were missing me.” He flatters himself.

“Well, you had fake news. Be assured of that!”

“Seriously?” He rolls his eyes at me.

“Yes!!”

“Oh, in that case I must go. I just thought……”

“Ha ha! Caught you. I have told you. Thinking isn’t your responsibility. You fail miserably at it.”

“Yeah, I know. I just thought I was better at it by now.”

“There, you are doing it again. My dear, you just are pathetic at it.” I rejoice in his failure.

“Yeah? So are you.”

“In what, may I ask?”

No, you may not!!”

Uuuuuuuurrrgggggghhhhhhhhhh

“Why not?”

“Just….”

“Okay, don’t say. But are you going to ever tell me where exactly have you been for so many days?”

“No!” Comes the blatant reply.

“Really?” I stare dumbfounded.

What is wrong with you? I want to scream. But I sip my coffee instead.

“So, what brings you here, today, after so many days? I thought you just forgot me?”

“You!!”

“Oh, please don’t start that again!! Stop being cheesy!!”

“It’s not cheesy.”

“It is.”

“It’s not. And even if it is, at least it’s better than your coffee!!”

I remain silent.

“Are you going to say anything?” He chirps.

I am still silent.

“Okay, then I am leaving.” He is losing patience now.

“WAIT! You can’t go….”

“I know. I know. The coffee isn’t over yet.” He finishes for me.

“So do I get the pleasure to know your name, now?” I am all too politeness for him.

He rolls his eyes and smirks. He just knows its fake.

“You could you if you wanted to.”

“But you won’t say your name.” I almost spill my cup in screaming at him.

“You won’t ask.” He bats his wings angrily.

“I just did.”

“Okay, I will tell you today, just as soon as you finish your idiotic, extremely hot, stupid, excessively strong, unwanted and sour coffee!!!!!”

He has crossed his limits.

I fume.

He winks.

I gulp down the coffee. Enough is enough. I will know his name, today.

He winks again. He smiles mischievously. Bats his wings.

“Aisi baate kiya na karo..” And just as swiftly he flies away, above and beyond. And in another second he is too far away from me.

He is gone. The coffee cup is empty. The wind is whistling into my ears. In the background the wonderful lady, that gorgeous Farida Khannumsmiles vainly into nothingness, “Jaan jati hai jab uth k jate ho tum……..

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Until we meet again.

 

Take care!

More about this stupid, nerving, extremely irritating Coffee Hater: Mr. Coffee Hater- My New Friend!

I Am Not Unique!

You try to be unique.

You want to be different!

But there have been millions and trillions of years before.

And every time you put an effort to be exclusive,

There are people and stories,

Words and books,

Those prove better than you.

 

Anything you want to say,

Has already been said.

Time and again,

You feel only repetitive.

But does it mean

That you should stop,

Or shut your voice?

 

May be, I am not exceptional,

I don’t say anything irreplaceable.

But I have my own reasons to say it again.

I have my own beliefs to feel it again.

It is not about what I say,

May be, it is all about how I say?

All about, why I say?

Hopes And Expectations!

Unknown

Just wondering..

While on the one hand you are striving towards it, and on the other there is only faith and a vain belief.

What exactly happens?

Does that belief turn into the expectations that we are taught not to have?

Or the hope itself is a reflection on the said expectations which we are not suppose to have?

Or, is there a fine line between hope and expectations which I am blinded not to see?

Or they are just two words trying to play with my mind?

Any thoughts?

 

यादें

वो घुंघरू की जँकार

वो झिलमिलाता ताल.

 

वो बजते ढोल

वो सरगम के बोल.

 

वो थिरकते पैर

वो नशीले नैन.

 

वो दिल धड़कता

वो साँसे झूमती.

 

वो मन मचलता

वो अनकही ख़ुशी.

 

वो ज़िंदा होने का एहसास

वो ज़िंदा रहने की प्यास.

 

आज सब बहुत याद आ रहे हैं.

Calm!!

This is what I came upon social media today. Guess, being socially active is not after all, all bad?

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A much needed respite from daily humdrum, from routine monotony, from everyday expectations.

Try it, it does look, sound and feel peaceful!