Another social gathering

I think I am having too many social gathering these days. Anyways, I was there sitting among-st my peeps, all dressed up and engrossed in what was going on around. Well, it was a ‘jagran’ (where you are awake all night and sing spiritual songs/bhajan).

I for a fact like these occasions, it is an absolute change from all of your arduousness. So there I was sitting beside my cousin almost singing to the rhythms when something caught my attention. And how I perceive is something like this.

Haven’t the present generation heard a lot about being anti-socializing in the form of socializing and even about being too much on their phones and over the net? But there are exceptions. So this might not be wrong. It’s true that we are drifting away from socializing in the form of socializing but the reality also has it other side. In my gathering there were very few people from present generation and anyways this is not about them. What I saw was that the older and the dear ones were busy engrossed on their cell-phones. Though some of them were obviously wholly-devoted but some of them were more interested in ‘sharing’ what they were seeing. I saw people over whatsapp chatting, someone sharing a video to the other who could not be present, snapchat was also to be seen, oh and yes I literally saw a check in for this too on my feed post. So is it only the present generation that is all caught up in ‘seizing the moment?’

It is good to capture something but what about also trying to at least live the moment too. We all click pictures and take videos but what about staying in the present too?

They say that the present generation is not that ‘religious’, I say “may be not” but what about pretending to be too religious and being present physically while the mind wanders to a distant land where some altogether another dream is coming true. For me nothing is wrong in that too but then why criticize when someone else does it and try make it right for yourself.

Anyways it was fun for a change to see the reverse.

 

A different feeling

We had a social gathering, a very small one for that matter including only close friends and family. Our family likes to keep everything extra so in the prospect of keeping a little extra we had ‘a little more than necessary extra.’ Well, I am talking about food.

Our religious beliefs and our moral values both tell us not to waste any of it which made the duty of us four cousins to do something useful with that. We had not time to clear everything and tidy up and the only option was ‘sharing’ and ‘distributing’.

Needless to say it is easy in our surrounding to find the needy and the poor. We went to a nearby temple outside which we found a family of five who could surely use our food. We unbundled the food packets and gave it to them, the box of sweets being a little more than they expected. Their eyes almost questioned, “All of it? Just for us?” and we were all exuberant just do the small deed. There was a lot for them and yet they promised that they’d share it with all of their other mates.

It was a different feeling altogether, which I will not be able to express with the limits of my vocabulary. I might have over the years helped someone in need with some money, or some old clothes or even food but I had never felt this. Never had I seen people with such feeling in their hearts and never had I seen someone in need considering the help so worthy. I have never been in favour of giving money randomly because I am never able to trust where the money is going? What would be bought with that? Was the need real or made up? But this help was exceptional.

This deed despite being so petty made me feel something which I hadn’t in a long time, or I don’t even know if I ever have.

Thoughts

I was driving my bike at a speed of 40-50 when suddenly I crashed my brakes only to realise I hadn’t missed the exit and I could go on. I thought I was thinking too much and might have missed my way. Well, I also thought I could write something out of it.

My mind started wandering again when again I braked on my speed. “It’s a red light, you can’t cross that Moushmi.” I saw two men break the rule and I thought I could write something out of it too.

My mind wavered again and I thought why my mind is so unstable? Why does it have to think so much? And then I thought I could write something on thinking too.

And then somehow I was at my destination and I thought, yet again, where did the 40 minute ride go? And oh, yet again I thought I could write on my thought process or even fading of time.

Hence this post where I don’t exactly know what I am trying to say and neither does my mind know how it actually ends up from one thought to another.

Sorry to bore you with my random ramblings.

Does anyone have such thoughts too, please tell me I am not alone. 😀

Why?

I stood there stumped, knowing not what to do, I had no idea what was happening, what was all the fuss about? The people around me were exhilarated, but why? I was at a party or a gathering, but why? Everything seemed chic and elegant, people sipping red wine, women bothered with their dresses, men seemed to be discussing on serious issues and in the end was an elevated stage, and someone was announcing my name. Oh! my name but why?

I stood there defining myself in the dark crimson evening gown holding onto my clutch and the phone, trying not to smudge my make-up. But as usual I embarrassed myself in front of everyone as the tears trolled down my kohl outlined eyes. I started walking towards the stage, took just a step ahead when someone blocked my way. A woman, she was holding a book in hand and as I look bewildered she thrust it towards me and also gave me a pen, but why?

I heard my name being announced yet again. I smiled and walked with tears in my eyes, trying to stop them, but why?

The woman stopped me again, an asked me to sign the book, but why? I saw the book and I couldn’t just contain myself. I lost all control. I cried and laughed, all at the same time. The book cover had my name on it and I just needed to sit down to get control of myself, but why?

With shivering hands I signed the book and the moment I returned it, I woke up; but why?

Why did I have to wake up?

PC: Pinterest

 

 

Her last wish

She was an old lady and considered her life to be content with life with children, grandchildren, and even great grandchildren. She had lived happily until her last few days which had been too torturing and too painful for her old soul. Doctors had reported only 24% of her heart to be working and one of her kidney’s had been dysfunctional too. Constantly being shifted from CCU to ICU and back and forth, we had lost all our hopes; but she hadn’t.

There was this big religious event in our city which was long awaited for. Basically the ‘Dhwaja’ i.e. the flag which is hoisted in the temple of ‘Shrinath ji’ was to be brought to our city. This auspicious moment is too rare and is considered very pious. Well, I don’t know much about it so coming straight to the point, this dear old lady wanted to witness this propitious moment.

“The second I see the ‘dhwaja’ take me, my lord. Just let me see it once.” This was kind of her last wish. Every single person in her family wanted it to happen, everyone wanted her to stay, at least to be the spectator of this great event.

Ironically enough the moment the flag reached our city she breathed her last. Her dear wish was in the same city and she could not see it.

Her last wish remained unsatisfied or will she find peace in His abode. Her faith was so strong that even we thought that she’d live to see the Holy figure. Unfortunately, not. I for a matter think that it was good that she was relieved of this terrible pain that her body was for almost 10 days and more.

I am no one to comment here on anything. It’s just that I have heard too much about this dear lady and ‘her last wish’ in the past few days and couldn’t help but pour out my mind here. And as for this flag thing- for me it was just materialistic, the true God, the true faith resides in you, in your heart. Do your Karma and leave everything else on the destiny. Everything can never be in our control so why even try it. I hope she finds content above the glimpse of the materialistic ‘dhwaja.’

Just another angry woman!!!

I am just another angry woman

Who screams and cries pressing a pillow against her mouth.

 

I am just another angry woman

Whose father abounds her in her own house,

Leaving behind no scope for dreams and aspirations.

 

I am just another angry woman

Who screams inside

While her mother can never take her side.

 

I am just another angry woman

Who screams awild

When her brother says she can’t party tonight.

 

I am just another angry woman

Who bites her lips

When her husband tries to wound her soul.

 

I am just another angry woman

Who washes and cleans

While her mother in law goes to a beauty dream.

 

I am just another angry woman

Who completes the school book

While her carefree son goes on to his father’s good books.

 

I am just another angry woman

Who vows to take her daughters side

If only I knew how it would be astride.

I am just another angry woman.

I am just another angry woman.

 

 

Cogito Ergo Sum. ["I think Therefore I am"]

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