Tag Archives: nightmares

When You Just Cannot Breathe!

I was strangled. A rope tied around my neck, the grip was getting tighter by the second, and my eyes were widening with the same force. Beads of sweat rolled from my forehead, to the corners of my cheeks, towards the chin falling onto my breasts, mingling with the musk beneath.

 

I tried to free my hands, my legs, but all I could do was to sway in motion on the floor, wriggling like a paralyzed dog. Then came the panic attack and I couldn’t breathe, I thought it was just an attack out of fear, but no I couldn’t breathe any more. My mouth was trying to tear through the duct tape- in vain kissing it. My eyesight was simply wading, I could barely see any more. People were coming in, finally coming in view, but just at that very moment my eyes gave in, my senses were crumbling. Legs were moving in front of me, I could see through the watery eyes, despite the blazing fury. I could listen to their heartfelt laughter, despite the wringing noise in my ears.

I kicked one last time, in vain.

I gripped my hands with the fingers through the rope, in vain.

I stomped, wriggled, in vain.

I craned my neck, in vain.

I breathed the last sigh, trying to relieve the pain, but in vain.

I strained to see, but all in vain.

I shut my eyes, falling deep, deep into the oceans of nothingness, uncertainty.

I was so choked up, I just couldn’t breathe, I lost all hope, surrendering to that uncertainty.

And just then I woke up, finally breathing again.

Waking Up With A Smile.

I woke up with a smile today!! Yeah, I was as surprised. Just before I was coming back to consciousness, bidding good bye to my unconscious or absolute unconscious, there was a light shy smile on my face. Yes, I could feel it all, almost know why I was smiling too. But just then I woke up and realized that I was smiling. How was it possibly even true? I barely smile awake, I mean to say, I laugh, a lot, but smiling is different to me and there I was smiling pretty smiles in my dreams, in my sleep. And just then fear gripped me for smiling and I stopped immediately and came back to reality. I woke up.

 

But it would be good if I could remember exactly why I was smiling about, what was so good, even if in my dreams that made me smile. Why couldn’t I have it in reality? What was it in my dreams? Why was it in my dreams? What was so fulfilling? Why did I forget it? I sure remember all the nightmares, so accurately, so precisely then why couldn’t I remember the one dream that I want to remember!!